This past Sunday night our C&Cs met with (most) of our parents to discuss the vast topic of courtship. I found the meeting very helpful ... it was encouraging to see all the vital areas that everyone agreed upon, to hear wise words from both the married and single, and it was instructive to hear the differences of opinion on the smaller details of some areas - each opinion being well-thought out, biblically informed, and empathetic as well as rational ... it is yet another reminder that courtship and relationships are not clear-cut story-book situations; it is largely an area of wisdom that differs in detail from person to person (details bound under general "set" principles that are clearly outlined in the Bible).

There are a couple recurring themes that stood out to me:

The Importance of Input:
Especially from godly parents. The input of both my parents has been one of the main sources of wisdom for me in this area. They provide a biblical perspective for me (often drawing my attention to verses such as Matt. 6:33 and Prov. 3:5-6); they listen to me; they counsel me in small details. I have been saved from some rather foolish choices because of conversations with them, and I trust that God is using them to help me to walk according to His will. I have generally found, in the area of "relationships" (for lack of a better word), if you don't think it's important enough to share with your parents ... it usually is. And if you simply do not want to tell your parents, it's even more important to seek them out.
Also important is the input of wise and godly people in the church. My parents are not infallible - their just wiser and more experienced than I am. Also, as our C&C meeting showed, often people approach the same situation in different ways, and each way makes a lot of sense! There is wisdom to be found in variety.
More and more, I feel my own inadequacy in this area, so I'm very grateful that God has blessed me with outstanding parents and many great people in my church and school, who He uses as a means of wisdom for me.

God is the First Initiator:
The fact is, before the man initiates and the woman responds, God has already been working in both their hearts. I think Scripture shows that God is the one who not only created romance, but continues to create it. Genesis 2:22 and Malachi 2:13-15 show that God brings the two together into one (with a portion of the Spirit - an interesting reflection of the Trinity in the One God). God, whose sovereign influence extends even to the leanings of our hearts (Exodus 10:1-2; Ps. 139) ... His influence extends to romance as well! God plans our romance; God carries out our romance. This is a marvelous thing to think about - if, before or during a courtship, you feel confused and unsure of God's will, know that He cares about your every need and desire and emotion, know that He is good and wise, know that He is sovereign. Know that He will guide the relationship either to marriage (regardless our blunders) or to a God-honoring decision against marriage (to that particular individual, that is) ... and He does this for our good (Rom. 8:28)!

Sometimes "matters of the heart" can be confusing, so these thoughts have often encouraged me. I hope they might do the same for you.